Exactly what the name says it is: a rolled up edition of the wizard newspaper. Appears in Limited Edition DLC and can only be obtained with the "Bathrobe" wizard model as the default starting staff.
Fast swing time.
Damage so low as to be inconsequential - example: hitting a villager with the Gram sword inflicts 305 damage, versus 25 for this weapon.
Knockback so slight as to be inconsequential.
One of the most - if not the most - useless starter weapons. About the only reason to ever hang onto this weapon is to brag that you got through the game without relying on a weapon's enchantments (since this one has none).